


South Park Likes This.

by aroceu



Series: you have gay friends [2]
Category: South Park
Genre: Crack, Facebook, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-04
Updated: 2012-05-04
Packaged: 2017-11-04 20:24:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/397867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aroceu/pseuds/aroceu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone in South Park has a Facebook. Seriously.</p>
            </blockquote>





	South Park Likes This.

**Stan Marsh** is in a relationship with **Kyle Broflovski**. ♥  
_- **Kenny McCormick** , ****Randy Marsh**** , ****cupid!Cartman**** , ****fag hags**** and **5756 others** like this._  
**cupid!Cartman** fags stick 2gether

 **Kenny McCormick** is in a relationship with **Butters Stotch**. ♥  
_- **Kenny McCormick** , **fag hags** and **27 others** like this._  
**Stan Marsh** what the fuck  
**Stan Marsh** what the actual fuck dude  
**Clyde Donovan** o.O  
**Eric Cartman** ewwww more fags  
**Eric Cartman** no homophobe  
**Stan Marsh** dude cartman you rip on me and kyle for being fags all the time  
**Eric Cartman** thats bcuz i h8 u guys  
**Eric Cartman** so so much

 **Butters Stotch** is in a relationship with **Kenny McCormick**. ♥  
_- **Kenny McCormick** , **fag hags** and **12 others** like this._  
**Clyde Donovan** O.o  
**Steven Stotch** What is this? You’re grounded, mister!  
**Butters Stotch** im sorry…  
**Butters Stotch** oh hamburgers  
**Steven Stotch** That’s right mister! Now go to your room!  
**Kenny McCormick** he’s grounded for being gay?  
**Linda Stotch** No, for having this posted past this bedtime.

 **Kenny McCormick** thinks  Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflovski should just fuck already :|  
_- **238479 people** like this._  
**Kyle Broflovski** Kenny, why?!  
**Kenny McCormick** just saying ;)  
**Kyle Broflovski** You don’t have to post it on Facebook! My mom could see this!  
**Kenny McCormick** :P  
**Stan Marsh** … we already have?  
**Stan Marsh** fucked i mean  
_- **Kenny McCormick** likes this comment._  
**Sheila Broflovski** WHATWHATWHAT???   


  


-

  


**Kyle Broflovski** > **Stan Marsh**  
Dude. So like, there’s a school dance tomorrow. Wanna go with me?

 **Stan Marsh** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
dude  
seriously  
youre asking me on facebook

 **Kyle Broflovski** > **Stan Marsh**  
What? I’m not gonna wait until tomorrow at school…

 **Stan Marsh** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
then you could just come over  
or call me  
maybe

 **Kyle Broflovski** > **Stan Marsh**  
But I like Facebook :(

 **Stan Marsh** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
fuck u  
**Kenny McCormick** i’m sure you do, stan  
**Kyle Broflovski** Kenny, go away, we’re supposed to be fighting.  
**Kenny McCormick** i can fuck you, if that’s the case ;)  
**Kyle Broflovski** Aren’t you supposed to be in a relationship?  
**Kenny McCormick** good point.  Butters Stotch – threeway?  
**Butters Stotch** huh what?  
**Kyle Broflovski** NO. GOD. EW, KENNY. NO.  
**God** Did someone say my name?  
**Kenny McCormick** eh, more for me  
**Kenny McCormick** get the hand lotion, butters, i’m coming over :D  
**Stan Marsh** wow kenny classy on my wall post too  
_- **Kyle Broflovski** likes this comment._

\- 

**Stuart McCormick** im white trash n im in trouble

\- 

**Eric Cartman** just saw the new ginger jew girl in skool. get ready 4 ur new gf  Kyle Broflovski  
_- **cupid!Cartman** likes this._  
**Stan Marsh** uh  
_- **Kyle Broflovski** and **Kenny McCormick** like this comment._  
**Stan Marsh** but he’s already taken?  
**Stan Marsh** by me?  
****Token Black**** no cartman  
**Kyle Broflovski** No, fatass, I don’t want to be set up with anyone by you.  
**Eric Cartman** but u n da fag r fightin…  
**Kenny McCormick** are you kidding? did you see them at the dance last night?  
**Bebe Stevens** omg that was so cute!  
**Wendy Testaburger** The cutest thing ever! :D  
**Heidi Turner** i couldn’t stop staring!!!!!  
**Patty Nelson** ikr!!!  
**Kenny McCormick** wtf attack of the fag hags 

\- 

**Nichole** is in a relationship with **Token Black**. ♥  
_- **Eric Cartman** and **cupid!Cartman** like this._  
**Eric Cartman** omg  
**cupid!Cartman** so cuuuuute 

\- 

**God** likes  fucking people.

\- 

 

 

 **Bridon Gueermo** made it to championships!  
_- **Wendy Testaburger** , **Heidi Turner** and **a shitload of other girls** like this. _

\- 

**Randy Marsh** has an idea for a new musical! ft handjobs  
**Sharon Marsh** Ooh, I can help.  
**Stan Marsh** ewwww mom  
**Stan Marsh** ewwwwwww dad  
**Stan Marsh** ewwwwwwwwww no  
**Shelly Marsh** fuck u dad  
**Randy Marsh** what?

\- 

**Eric Cartman** is now friends with **Cthuhlu**.

\- 

**Shelly Marsh** is in a relationship with **Larry Feegan**. ♥  
**Kyle Broflovski** But I thought he died.  
**Kenny McCormick** oh, if only you said that after every one of my deaths  
**Kyle Broflovski** What? But you haven’t died, Kenny.  
**Kenny McCormick** don’t worry about it.  
**Shelly Marsh** we had a deal with satan  
**Shelly Marsh** and poseidon

 **Larry Feegan** > **Shelly Marsh**  
you make me come out of my shell, shelly  
_- **Shelly Marsh** likes this._

 **Larry Feegan** > **Shelly Marsh**  
your voice is like bells, shelly  
_- **Shelly Marsh** likes this._

 **Larry Feegan** > **Shelly Marsh**  
with you everything’s well, shelly  
_- **Shelly Marsh** likes this._

 **Larry Feegan** > **Shelly Marsh**  
you helped me survive hell, shelly.  
_- **Shelly Marsh** likes this._

 **Kyle Broflovski** OKAY I THINK WE GET IT  Larry Feegan  
_- **Stan Marsh** , **Kenny McCormick** , **Eric Cartman** and 2 others like this._  
**Shelly Marsh** SHUT UP TURD

 **Larry Feegan** > **Shelly Marsh**  
you make me want to be a better person  
shell-y  
_- **Shelly Marsh** likes this._

\- 

**Eric Cartman** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
jews

 **Kyle Broflovski** > **Eric Cartman**  
No.

 **Eric Cartman** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
play st00pid games

 **Eric Cartman** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
jews

 **Kyle Broflovski** > **Eric Cartman**  
NO.

 **Eric Cartman** > Kyle Broflovsi  
thats y their lame  
**Kenny McCormick** they’re*  
_- **Kyle Broflovski** likes this comment._

\- 

**Kenny McCormick** likes  NASCAR.

\- 

**Scott Malkinson** has a lisp and diabetes!  
_- **Eric Cartman** and **14 others** like this._

\- 

**Wendy Testaburger** > **Kyle Broflovski**  


> Wendy Testaburger just beat your high score on Tetris Battle! Can you beat her?

**Wendy Testaburger** > **Eric Cartman**  


> Wendy Testaburger just beat your high score on Tetris Battle! Can you beat her?

**Eric Cartman** NO  
**Eric Cartman** NO  
**Eric Cartman** DIE HO  
**Eric Cartman** I WILL BEET U  
**Clyde Donovan** lol  
**Wendy Testaburger** Haha, and you said that I would suck. P.S. I already BEAT you. In both senses.  
**Eric Cartman** fuck u omg no go die  
**Kyle Broflovski** Yeah, she beat me too. Was that really your first time, Wendy?  
**Wendy Testaburger** Yep! Number 1 on the leaderboard after my first game!  
**Kyle Broflovski** How is that even possible?  
**Eric Cartman** no ho cheated  
**Eric Cartman** bitch hacked in2 servr  
**Eric Cartman** die skank  
**Wendy Testaburger** Hey! I wouldn’t cheat!  
**Eric Cartman** nigga plz  
**Token Black** …

\- 

**Craig Tucker** so  Tweek Tweak just fell asleep on me… ┌∩┐ ._. ┌∩┐  
_- **Fag hags** like this._  
**Tweek Tweak** GAH! im sorry!!!!!  
**Tweek Tweak** GAH TOO MUCH PRESSURE!  
**Craig Tucker** its ok ┌∩┐ ._. ┌∩┐  
**Tweek Tweak** OH MY GOD!!!  
**Tweek Tweak** IM SORRY!!!! I DIDNTT HAVE ANY COFFEEE YESTERDAY!!  
**Craig Tucker** well its obvious uve had some 2day… ┌∩┐ ._. ┌∩┐  
**Token Black** why do you do that craig. just. why. 

\- 

**Eric Cartman** WHO IS  The Coon? BUY YOUR T-SHIRTS TOMORROW AT SCHOOL DURING ALL LUNCHES!

 **Kyle Broflovski** > ****The Coon****  
Eric Cartman  
**Eric Cartman** no….

\- 

**Kyle Broflovski** just saw the Jewpacabra today! :O  
_- **Stan Marsh** and **Kenny McCormick** like this._  
**Eric Cartman** OH SHIT  
**Eric Cartman** NOOOOO  
**Eric Cartman** NOOOOOOOO  
**Eric Cartman** NOOOOOOOOOOOOO 

**Butters Stotch** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
hey fellas! u were rite, eric is hiding under his bed rite now. even tho @ first i acidentaly peeked in2 teh rong room n thot he wuz the 1 sticking his weirner in ms cartmans butt.

 **Kyle Broflovski** > **Butters Stotch**  
TMI. But thanks, dude.

 **Kyle Broflovski** > **Stan Marsh**  
I’m thinking of posting that as my Facebook status once a week.

 **Stan Marsh** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
haha

\- 

**Stan Marsh** > **Kyle Broflovski**  
wanna come over?  
**Kyle Broflovski** Sure :)  
**Randy Marsh** r u guys playing guitar hero?  
**Stan Marsh** … yeah dad  
**Randy Marsh** ooh wait 4 me i want 2 cum!  
**Randy Marsh** lol  
**Stan Marsh** … no dad

 **Randy Marsh** > **Stan Marsh**  
y did i c u n kyle makin out!? i thot u were playin vid games!  
**Stan Marsh** dad no stop  
**Stan Marsh** did you NOT see my relationship status on fb jesus christ you wanted me to use it  
**Randy Marsh** oh…

\- 

**Eric Cartman** is in a relationship with **Wendy Testaburger**. ♥  
_- **Candy shippers** like this._  
**Stan Marsh** ok no THIS is what the actual fuck  
**Kyle Broflovski** Maybe she lost a bet? 

\- 

**Pip Pirrup** Cheerio!  
_- **British people** like this._

\- 

**Stan Marsh** just uploaded a photo: " **look at kyles hair** "  
_- **Kenny McCormick** and **Bebe Stevens** like this._  
**Bebe Stevens** nice ass ;)  
**Kyle Broflovski** DUDE NO I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO POST IT ON FACEBOOK.  
**Stan Marsh** haha  
**Token Black** why is he half naked?  
**Kenny McCormick** dude, why do you think?  
**Craig Tucker** gay ┌∩┐ ._. ┌∩┐  
**Kenny McCormick** speak for yourself  
**Craig Tucker** ┌∩┐ ._. ┌∩┐ 

**Kyle Broflovski** listened to  Gersplush on SoundCloud.  


>   
>  [ **Plug-in needed to view Flash.** ]  
> 

  
_- **Eric Cartman** and **19 others** like this._  
 **Stan Marsh** dude that band is shitty  
\- _**Other cynical assholes** like this comment._  
 **Stan Marsh** no wait  
 **Stan Marsh** okfajjy its buhhegettegr nowzcsd  
 **Kyle Broflovski** *sigh* Time to confiscate your beer again...

\- 

**The Pope** > **God**  
What do you want me to tell your people now, Master?  
P.S. The rabbit is still in good hands.

 **God** > **The Pope**  
Make me a sandwich.

 **The Pope** > **God**  
Yes Master.

\- 

**Kyle Broflovski** listed **Ike Broflovski** as his brother.  
**Stan Marsh** dude hes like 2  
**Kyle Broflovski** Not really, lol. Besides, he's definitely mature enough to get a Facebook. I mean, he banged a chick when he was in kindergarten!  
**Kenny McCormick** dude, only real men take it up the ass like you ;)  
**Kyle Broflovski** KENNY!  
**Stan Marsh** how would you know hes the one who takes it up the ass  
**Kenny McCormick** i guessed? 

\- 

**Token Black** is now single. ♥  
_- **Wendy Testaburger** likes this._  
**cupid!Cartman** WHAT  
**Eric Cartman** NOOOOO  
**cupid!Cartman** CRYYYY  
**Eric Cartman** SOBBBB 

**Kyle Broflovski** saw the Jewpacabra again!  
_- **Stan Marsh** and **Kenny McCormick** like this._

 **Eric Cartman** sdflkjdsflkj worst day evr  
_- **Stan Marsh** , **Kyle Broflovski** and **Kenny McCormick** like this._  
**Eric Cartman** i h8 u guys 

\- 

**Mysterion** meeting tonight at the lair!   
**The Coon** no fag thats mah basement  
**Mint Berry Crunch** should i bring my cereal bowl?  
**Mysterion** The Coon: your mom's letting us use it. Mint Berry Crunch: uh... no.  
**Liane Cartman** sorry poopsiekins!  
**The Coon** fuk u mom  
**The Coon** i mean  
**The Coon** fuk me  
**Tupperware** r we gunna need lemon squares?  
**Mysterion** probs  
**Human Kite** Okay, I'll let Toolshed know since his mom makes the best lemon squares. He's right here with me :)  
**Mysterion** mmmm, kite/toolshed sex.  
**Human Kite** Ew, dude.  
**Professor Chaos** can i com 2?  
**Mysterion** yeah, but we'll need to lock you up  
**Mysterion** i'll deal with you later ;)  
**Henrietta Biggle** bradley mom wants u 2 watch conformist movies w/ her 2night  
**Mint Berry Crunch** okay! sorry i can't come guys!  
**Mysterion** that's perfectly fine. seriously. 

\- 

**Kanye West** is a gay fish.  
_- **2198798** like this._

\- 

**Stan Marsh** , **Kyle Broflovski** , **Kenny McCormick** and **10 others** like  blowjobs.  
\- **Randy Marsh** com 2 my new muscal!!!

\- 

**Kyle Broflovski** posted a  link on **Stan Marsh** 's wall.  
Dude, did you see this? http://canadiannews.com/articles/somethingyoucantdowithoutyourasshole.php  


> **NEWS REPORT: The end of fart jokes?** Comedians Terrance and Phillip, known on their show _Terrance and Phillip_ , and also the ex-husbands of the Queef Sisters, were supposedly attempting to have anal sex when they realized that they could not find Phillip's asshole! Witnesses say... Read more.  
> 

**Stan Marsh** wait what  
 **Kyle Broflovski** I know right? IT'S THE END OF TERRANCE AND PHILLIP FOREVER! NO MORE FARTS :'(  
 **Stan Marsh** no kyle that smileys gay  
 **Stan Marsh** i mean they were going to have sex  
 **Kyle Broflovski** Oh. Yeah. I guess.  
 **Kyle Broflovski** Still. NO MORE FARTS D8 

\- 

**Eric Cartman** whyre there fags everywere  
_- **Boy Scouts of America** and **Westboro Baptist Church** like this._  
**Eric Cartman** no homophobe  
**Westboro Baptist Church** yes homophobe  
**Big Gay Al** No, we hate fags too!  
**Mr. Slave** yeah!  
**Some Other Gay Guy** Them and their Harleys!  
**Eric Cartman** no i wuz talkin abt gay ppl  
**Westboro Baptist Church** They're okay as long as we can convert them. Or protest at their funerals.  
**Satan** You're okay as long as I kill you.  
_- **98023469 people** like this._

\- 

**Satan** > **Damien Thorn**  
Clean your room!

 **Damien Thorn** > **Satan**  
Leave me alone Dad. Go fuck Saddam Hussein.

 **Satan** > **Damien Thorn**  
Sadface :(

 **Satan** My son hates me, my boyfriend hates me, I'm surrounded by retarded demons all the time, I don't have a best friend... I can't live like this anymore.  
**God** Don't do it Satan. *pats you*  
**Satan** *sniffles* God, can you help me?  
**God** I don't know about that, my life isn't much better. I'm half-cat and half-hippo, surrounded by fucking Mormons all the time, and Michael always plays his fucking harp and it sounds like shit.  
**Michael** hey :(  
**God** But we'll get through this, Satan. I know we can.  
**God** Only an eternity to go. 

\- 

**Eric Cartman** likes  Vagisil.

\- 

**Kyle Broflovski** The Jewpacabra was in my backyard!  
_- **Stan Marsh** and **Kenny McCormick** like this._

 **Liane Cartman** my son refuses to leave my room right now. not tonight, boys.  
**Jimmy Vulmer** a-a-a-a-a-aw-aw-aw-aw-aw-aw-awwwwww  
**Towelie** damn  
**Liane Cartman** sorry boys 

\- 

**Butters Stotch** owie! i cant sit down!  
_- **Kenny McCormick** likes this._  
**Kenny McCormick** sorry babe ;)  
**Kyle Broflovski** EW DUDES TMI  
**Stan Marsh** kyle was like that too yesterday dont worry  
**Kyle Broflovski** DUDE!

\- 

**Kenny McCormick** added a Life Event: Deceased. ( Today)  
**Stan Marsh** oh my god they killed kenny!  
**Kyle Broflovski** You bastards!  
**Butters Stotch** D:

\- 

**Eric Cartman** likes  Ziplining.  
**Stan Marsh** what?  
**Eric Cartman** i likd it just 2 unlike it.  
**Stan Marsh** oh  
**Kyle Broflovski** That makes no sense.  
**Eric Cartman** shutup jew

\- 

**Kenny McCormick** added a Life Event: Birth. ( Today)

\- 

**Butters Stotch** yay im not grounded anymore!  
**Linda Stotch** I don't think so young man! When was this posted?  
**Butters Stotch** 8:01... oh hanmburgers 

\- 

**Satan** is in a relationship with **God**. ♥  
_- **Pip Pirrup** , **cupid!Cartman** and **8 others** like this._  
**Kenny McCormick** oh.  
**Kenny McCormick** well then.


End file.
